With Every Breath Read online

  With Every Breath

  A Light My Fire Series Novel

  J.H. Croix

  Contents

  1. Alice

  2. Jonah

  3. Alice

  4. Jonah

  5. Alice

  6. Alice

  7. Jonah

  8. Jonah

  9. Alice

  10. Jonah

  11. Alice

  12. Jonah

  13. Alice

  14. Alice

  15. Jonah

  16. Jonah

  17. Alice

  18. Jonah

  19. Alice

  20. Jonah

  21. Jonah

  22. Alice

  23. Jonah

  24. Alice

  25. Jonah

  26. Alice

  27. Jonah

  28. Jonah

  29. Alice

  30. Jonah

  31. Alice

  32. Jonah

  33. Alice

  34. Jonah

  35. Alice

  36. Alice

  37. Jonah

  38. Jonah

  39. Jonah

  40. Alice

  Epilogue

  Find My Books

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

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  Copyright © 2022 J.H. Croix

  All rights reserved.

  Cover design by Najla Qamber Designs

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  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Created with Vellum

  To finding light to guide us through darkness.

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  Chapter One

  Alice

  I stood at the edge of the lake with my boots planted on the dock. Taking a breath, I inhaled the crisp mountain air. Home. I was home.

  My eyes arced across the lake. Alaska was a show-off when it came to nature. For this early evening in autumn, the sky was awash in lavender with deep pink streaks, the colors shimmering on the waters of the clear lake. I let out a shout because I couldn’t help it, my voice echoing back to me.

  Impulsively, I tossed off my shirt, kicked off my boots, and shimmied down to nothing. I knew the lake would be bracingly cold, but I was ready. I needed this.

  On the heels of a deep breath, I sprinted to the end of the dock and dove. My fingertips struck the cold water, and it enveloped my body in the next second. It was crisp and cold. My skin tingled everywhere. With a single powerful kick, I surfaced, laughing at the shock of it and feeling more alive than I had in years.

  Although I was freezing, I needed to be in the water for a few more minutes, just because. I dove under the surface briefly, savoring the feel of the water sliding over my skin. I felt wild as if this moment brought me back to myself. I surfaced again and glanced up at the dock, letting out a yelp.

  The man standing there eyed me. He looked kind of cranky. That said, I couldn’t help but notice he was handsome. Actually, handsome didn’t even do him justice. He had auburn hair that shimmered with glints of gold from the setting sun. Even from here, I could see his piercing green eyes. Inexplicably, he wore a suit. His broad, well-defined shoulders filled it out very nicely. There weren’t many occasions to wear a suit in Alaska.

  “Um, hi?” I opened with.

  The man rested his hands on his hips, stepping to the edge of the dock. “What are you doing here?”

  “Swimming,” I stated the obvious. Unfortunately, I was getting uncomfortably cold. I treaded water rapidly.

  “You’re putting on a show,” he returned, clearly annoyed.

  “For who?”

  His hands dropped from his hips, one arm swinging in an arc and gesturing toward the shoreline. I followed to where he pointed and noticed a group gathered, visible in the backyard of a nearby property.

  “I didn’t hear anything,” I said. “And I need to get out of the water if you don’t mind. Also, you’re on my dock.”

  I started swimming toward it, metaphorically gathering my dignity. I was naked in a freezing lake in Alaska in front of a sexy hot guy in a suit. What the hell was happening?

  I swam to the ladder. I didn’t even have to look because I knew exactly where it was. I’d swum in this lake so much in my childhood. I curled my hands on the rungs and called up, “Could you please turn your back? Or better yet, just walk away?”

  When I heard footsteps moving away, I climbed up the ladder swiftly. The air was warmer than the water, but my skin prickled with goosebumps. I peered over the edge of the dock to see the man’s back facing me.

  I scurried onto the dock, fetching my clothes quickly while praying he was polite enough to keep his back turned the entire time. As soon as I had my jeans and shirt on, I announced, “All I have left to put on is my boots.”

  He turned around then while I sat down to lace them. A moment later, I stood as he waited in silence. “You can go now,” I said.

  “I figured I should make sure you weren’t hypothermic before I left,” he offered dryly.

  Lifting my arms out, I spun in a circle. “I’m fine. What is going on over there, by the way? That used to be Bea Adams’s place.”

  “Still is. She’s my grandmother. She’s getting married this evening.”

  My hand flew to my chest in surprise. “I didn’t see anyone when I came out.”

  For the first time, his eyes held a glint of humor and his mouth kicked up at one corner. My belly did a little swoop. “We walked out onto the lawn just in time for your dive,” he explained.

  My cheeks got hot. Hell, I got hot all over. Which, all things considered, was convenient because I was still chilly from my skinny-dip in the glacial lake.

  “Isn’t Bea around eighty or so now?”

  He nodded. “She still believes in love.”

  My lips curled into a smile. “Of course, she does. Please tell her I’m sorry for, I guess, naked diving in front of the group.” I rolled my eyes, mostly to myself. “Give her my best wishes, please. I’m Alice, Alice Hall. You are?”

  “Jonah. Adams,” he added his last name almost as an afterthought.

  “Nice to meet you, Jonah,” I replied before stepping closer and holding a hand out. “I’m sure maybe we met if you ever visited when you were younger.”

  He nodded. “Maybe.” His grip was warm, his hand engulfing mine. The feel of the calloused surface of his palm spun into the heat he’d elicited simply from half-smiling.

  “What are you doing here?” he asked as he dropped my hand.

  I took a quick breath. “I grew up here in Willow Brook. I live right there.” I gestured to my childhood home, which was adjacent to his grandmother’s property. “I just moved back to town. I’m taking over the veterinary clinic. What are you doing here?”

  “Attending my grandmother’s wedding.”

  “Oh, so you’re just visiting?”

  He shook his head. “I’m here for the wedding, but I’m a hotshot firefighter. I took a job on one of the crews in Willow Brook.”

  “Oh. Well, nice to meet you. Are you staying with Bea?”

  He chuckled, the sound gravelly and sending heat scattering over the surface of my skin. This man got to me.

  “I love her, but no. I don’t need to live with the honeymooners. I’m staying in—”

  “The place she used to rent out,” I interjected.

  Jonah nodded. “Exactly.”

  “So we’re neighbors then.”

  Another nod. “I’m sure I’ll see you around.”

  “I’m sorry for interrupting the wedding.”

  “Oh, Gram won’t mind. Someone thought perhaps we should check who this was because Gram didn’t think anyone was staying here.”

  “Let her know I’m back.” I paused, twisting my lips to the side. “I hope I gave the wedding a story.”

  His eyes held a hint of a smile again, and my belly swooped. “You did. I’ll be going then.”

  He turned and walked away, lifting a hand and waving over his shoulder.

  Chapter Two

  Jonah

  As I stepped off the dock, I couldn’t help but glance over my shoulder. Alice stood there, and even from a distance, our eyes collided. Electricity sizzled through the air. I forced myself to turn away. Stuffing my hands in my pockets, I continued walking, my stride long and even. My first glimpse of my new neighbor, and she’d been naked. My heart was still an echoing drumroll. All of my nerve endings felt electrified.

  I hadn’t felt this alive in years. To be specific, in four years.

  Shaking those thoughts away, I hurried through the trees in my suit, which felt totally out of place in Alaska. Gram wanted a formal weddin
g, and I would do just about anything for her, so here I was in my suit.

  A moment later, the trees opened up to the small field visible from the lake and offered a clear line of sight down to the dock. Alice was still on the end of the dock, but she had turned away and was looking out over the lake. The view was a stunner with the clear glacial water shimmering in the early evening and the mountains rising tall in the distance.

  “You didn’t have to chase her out of the water,” Gram called over as I approached the group.

  “I didn’t chase her out. The water must be freezing. She said she was getting out because it was cold,” I explained, feeling heat crawl up my neck and cheeks. I wasn’t prone to blushing. What the hell?

  My grandmother cast a dimpled smile at me as I stopped beside her. “I think it was a perfect start to my wedding.”

  “Yeah?” I prompted.

  “It makes the day special and funny.” She smiled over at her husband-to-be, Dennis. They were both old, weathered, wrinkled, and head over heels in love.

  My father cast an indulgent smile at his mother before glancing down at my mother as his shoulders shook with laughter. She squeezed his hand where her fingers were laced with his.

  I didn’t like thinking about it, but Gram wasn’t long for this world. She had a resurgence of lung cancer and was choosing not to get it treated this time. She’d smoked most of her life and had only quit a few years ago. The cancer had spread, and the doctor gave her maybe six months.

  My chest felt tight, and I took a quick breath. “Well, I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

  Dennis chuckled.

  “It’s Alice, right?” someone asked.

  I glanced over. “It’s Alice Hall. She said she just moved back.”

  Gram’s hand slapped her chest. “Aw, Alice. She’s a sweet girl.”

  I nodded. My one exchange with her had been an exercise in restraint on my part as I tried to get my rampaging lust under control. It was blue from a distance, but the lake’s water was nearly crystal clear up close. So, although the view of her body was blurry, it had been visible. My view of her diving in had been far too clear.

  “I’ll have to go over and see her. You should’ve invited her over,” Gram scolded.

  “She sent her best wishes,” I offered.

  “We’ll see her soon enough.” My grandmother glanced around. “Now where is our pastor?”

  Just then, Janet James came out of the back of the house, waving. “I’m here!”

  “Perfect,” Gram said, clasping her hands together.

  “Is Janet actually a pastor?” I asked.

  “She’s an officiant,” my grandmother replied. She smiled up at me. “For the purposes of today, she is.”

  I knew Janet from the coffee shop she ran in town. She was also a dear friend of my grandmother’s. Apparently, my grandmother had babysat Janet when she was younger, but now they both considered themselves old. Janet was a good twenty years younger than my grandmother, but I suppose the decades felt shorter as you got older.

  Janet stopped beside me, slipping her hand through my elbow and squeezing. “Hi, Jonah. You’re the best man, right?”

  “Course he is. My friends are dead,” Dennis offered laconically.

  I couldn’t help the laugh that slipped out. “Is that why I’m the best man?”

  He grinned. “Most of my friends are dead, but I love you like a son. If you were an asshole, I wouldn’t care if you were Bea’s grandson. You definitely wouldn’t be my best man.”

  I chuckled again. We swung into the wedding, and it was over in a blink. The next thing I knew, we were enjoying the reception in my grandmother’s house. She came over at one point, interrupting a conversation between my mother and me. My mother grinned and wandered off for more cake.

  Gram nudged me in the side with her elbow as she looked up at me. “I think you should go get Alice.”

  “What?”

  “She’s there all alone. Her parents are gone.”

  “Gone?” I asked.

  “Well, they died,” she clarified. “She can visit with everybody. We’ve got all this food, and you and she can be friends. You should be. Your place is closer to hers than my house.”

  “I don’t know where her house is,” I hedged.

  My grandmother blinked up at me. “Walk outside the front door and follow the path behind your house. It goes through some trees, and then there’s her house. It’s where she grew up.”

  “Is it okay for me to show up unannounced like that?”

  “Tell her I sent you,” she said with a firm nod.

  Because it was my grandmother and I loved her, I couldn’t refuse her. Of course, I was also curious about Alice. More curious than I wanted to be.

  A few minutes later, I walked through the trees as instructed. I could see the roof of the small house where I lived as I passed it. Another moment later, the trees opened up again, and there was another house. It was single-story structure ranch style home with a bright-red steel roof.

  A tall stand of birch trees was nearby with yellow leaves fluttering in the crisp early autumn air. I approached the house, wondering whether to go to the front door or the door on the side. Since the path led directly to the side, I walked up the stairs onto the side deck and knocked.

  An unfamiliar sense of anticipation slipped through me, and I forced myself to take a slow breath. I was accustomed to feeling numb to just about everything. Even as a hotshot firefighter, an adrenaline-fueled job, I rarely felt nervous.

  With her naked dive off the dock, this woman had brought something to life inside me. It felt like I was lumbering to my feet emotionally after a long hibernation.

  The door swung open, and Alice looked up at me. I didn’t know how long we stared at each other, but the entire moment felt electrified. She had silvery-gray eyes. They were wide with lush, dark lashes. Her dark hair, though damp and slicked back earlier, was drying in curls around her shoulders. A spray of freckles covered her cheeks, and her skin was flushed pink.

  My body tightened. It felt as if sparks shimmered in the air around us.

  “Hi,” she finally said.

  I had to clear my throat. “Hey. Gram sent me over here. She wants to invite you to the reception.”

  Alice blinked before a slow smile stretched across her face. “Of course. That’s the kind of thing Bea would do. She probably mentioned that my parents are gone, and I’m over here all alone.”

  “She did say that, almost exactly,” I offered.

  “I’ll come over. Give me a minute.” Alice wore a tank top with a flannel shirt unbuttoned over it, paired with leggings. “I’ll be right back.”

  My eyes lingered on the curve of her hips as she walked away. Fuck me. Alice gave off this earthy vibe and was delectably sexy.

  A few moments later, we walked back along the same path that had brought me here. Alice had swapped out her flannel shirt for a silky blouse over her tank top and slipped on a pair of cowboy boots. The only way to quell my body’s fiery reaction to her was to avoid looking at her. I focused on the walk, dodging rocks and stepping over exposed roots along the worn path.

  “So how is your grandmother?” Alice asked when she glanced sideways.

  Our eyes locked, and yet again, it felt as if sparks shimmered in the air briefly.

  “Good. I think.”

  “You think?” she asked.

  I had just met Alice, but I knew she was important to my grandmother. It was open news around town that Gram was sick. As I pondered how to reply, Alice added, “Something’s wrong.”