Slow Burn (Into The Fire Book 2) Page 29
“I’m on the pill, and I’m clean. Except for you…” I had to pause when emotion choked me. Aside from him, I’d never had sex with anyone without a condom. Cade was the man I’d lost my virginity to and the man who’d gone with me when I went to the doctor to start taking the pill. When I tried dating again, I simply couldn’t bring myself to let anyone past that layer. Not even Earl, not even when I thought I was going to marry him.
When Cade was silent, his hand frozen midair with a condom packet held in it, I got anxious. “Unless, I mean… Maybe…”
Whatever he saw in my eyes snapped him into motion. He tossed the condom packet to the floor and stretched out over me quickly. I hadn’t realized a tear had rolled down my cheek until he wiped it away with his thumb. It was such a relief to have him against me, his weight and strength wrapping me into the moment with him. His cock rested against my slick folds and need clawed at me, but I had to catch my breath.
He dusted kisses over my face. “God, Lia. Don’t look like that. I can’t take it,” he murmured.
“Well, I didn’t know what you were thinking,” I managed, gasping when his hips rocked against me, his cock sliding over my clit.
“It’s been seven years since I had sex with anyone without a condom, so I was just a little startled. Don’t think for a second I don’t want it,” he said, his hips arching into me again.
I took a shuddering breath, trying and failing to corral the wild need pounding through me. I didn’t want to talk anymore. “Cade, please…” Whatever I’d meant to say got lost the second he drew back and surged inside of me.
He curled his hands into mine, stretching them above my head. His eyes were like hot embers on me. I felt the burn of his gaze and couldn’t look away. He held still for a moment, and I sighed at the feel of my channel stretching to accommodate him. It felt so good, so right to have him filling me. I could feel his heart pounding in time with mine, his skin hot and slick against me. After a moment, he began to move. My sex clenched around him as he stroked into me—long and deep, he drove into me again and again and again. There was nothing gentle about this—my legs curled around him, my hips colliding with the rough pounding of his, his hands tightening their grip on mine, the scrape of his teeth against my neck and the burn of his eyes when I started to unravel.
Pleasure ripped through me, my climax so intense, I spun loose inside. The only thing anchoring me was the feel of Cade against me. He let out a growl, my name following in a rough cry as he went taut and then collapsed against me.
Chapter 20
Cade
I opened my eyes, momentarily disoriented. I wasn’t accustomed to waking to the feel of soft curves against me. Through the haze of sleep, I remembered it was Amelia sleeping beside me. The tension that had started to build inside eased instantly. I was on my back with one of her legs thrown across mine and her foot tucked in between my calves. My heart clenched at the familiar feel of her. I eased up on the pillows and glanced down at her. Her amber hair was a tousled mess around her face and shoulders. Emotion rocked me, colliding with the lust setting fire in my veins.
There’d never been any shortage of chemistry between us, yet somehow seven years mixed with a tangle of pain, regret and anger was like pouring octane fuel on the fire burning between us. I sifted my fingers through her hair, idly untangling the silky strands. She shifted slightly in her sleep, the feel of her skin sliding against mine sending blood straight to my groin. I wanted to savor this moment—the simple act of waking up with the one and only woman I’d ever loved on the heels of years of thinking we’d never have this chance again was so good I didn’t want to miss it. Yet, my body wasn’t so interested in taking anything slow. My need for her went from sleepy arousal to burning need so fast, it was hard to keep a grip.
When we’d made our way up here last night, we’d showered, and despite the fact I’d just spent myself inside of her once, one look at the water sluicing over her had me sliding my hands over her bottom and reaching between her thighs to find her hot, wet and ready. In a flash, I sank into her clenching heat.
After that, we’d tumbled into bed in the darkness. I took a slow breath and rolled my head to the side, glancing out the windows. She’d wisely situated the small home such that the windows to the front offered a clear view of the adjacent field and pond. In the early morning light, mist rose off the water. A flock of sandhill cranes was pecking at the grass at the edge of the field. Knowing Amelia, I’d guess she tossed cracked corn out for them all summer long. Sandhill cranes migrated to Alaska every summer and typically returned to the same area year after year. The tall, leggy birds could easily blend into the grass, but for their bright red crowns atop their heads. This flock had likely been coming here long before Amelia built here, yet she’d have gone out of her way to make sure her presence didn’t scare them away.
I took a steadying breath, trying to contain the emotion and need coursing through me. Amelia was a bundle of soft, lush curves against me. She shifted again, and I nearly groaned aloud. I felt her come awake with a subtle thread of tension humming through her body. She lifted her head, her amber eyes catching mine. God, I loved how she looked when she was sleepy. By nature, she was a strong, bold, confident woman. It was rare to see her with her guard down, but when she was sleepy it was. She stared at me, completely quiet for a moment, but I felt her heart starting to thud against me.
“Mornin’,” I said, brushing a few tangled strands of hair away from her eyes.
Her cheeks flushed. “Good morning. Um…”
Her words trailed off, and she glanced away, starting to look like she was thinking way too much.
“Amelia?”
Her eyes whipped back to mine.
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Start thinking too much.”
She stiffened, and I couldn’t help but grin. I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed getting under her skin, even just a little.
“I’m not…”
I moved fast, lifting her up and over me. She gasped, but she didn’t resist, which might’ve been fun. Her knees landed on either side of my hips. Exactly where I wanted her.
I looked up at her. The early morning sun was falling through the windows at an angle, catching her hair in its light and glinting it with gold. I could feel her slick heat against me. I was tempted, so fucking tempted, to drive into her right now. I couldn’t help it and arched into her. She gasped and closed her eyes.
“Wait. Not yet,” I bit out.
Her eyes flew open, lasering me with a glare.
“Don’t you dare tease like that,” she said, her voice still rough from sleep.
She started to rise up, but I was ready and I knew what I wanted.
In a flash, I rolled us and stretched out over her. There were so many things I wanted—perhaps a full week in bed with her would give me enough time—but right now, I had to taste her. I mapped my way down her body with my hands and lips, pausing to dally over her breasts. Full and round with taut, pink nipples, I could’ve spent all day there.
If she was still annoyed with me, it was lost amidst her rough sighs and occasional moans. I spread her knees apart, trailing my fingers up the insides of her thighs, which earned me a murmured curse. I dragged a finger through her folds. She was so wet, her thighs were damp. I meant to take my time, but the lust pounding through me was so strong, I couldn’t. I sank a finger knuckle-deep, savoring the clenching of her channel. A dip of my head and I set to exploring her with my tongue, while I fucked her with my fingers.
She tasted so good, I settled in—licking, stroking and sucking. I meant to make her come apart, but I’d forgotten how demanding she could be. She gripped my hair and yanked. I lifted my head, still toying inside her with my fingers, stretching and stroking.
“I need you. Now,” she demanded, her voice rough and raspy.
“You have me,” I countered, enjoying her frustration.
With her sex clenching around me,
I drew my thumb in a slow circle around her clit.
Her head fell back on a throaty cry, but she was only momentarily deterred. She lifted her head. Damn. She was fucking glorious with her hair a tangle around her face, her skin flushed and damp, and her breasts rising and falling with her heavy pants.
“Inside,” she ordered.
I dragged my fingers out and sank them in deep. “Like this?”
She muttered a curse and yanked at me. Seeing as I wanted the same thing, I stopped teasing. The moment I was stretched atop her, our bodies flush together and the tip of my cock at her entrance, I held still, locking eyes with her. Electricity fairly snapped in the air around us. The intensity of connection I felt with her—so sharp it pierced my heart—hit me with a force so strong, I lost my breath. I stared at her—hard—and slowly sank into her. Again, what I meant to do and what happened weren’t the same. I wanted to go slow, to be able to savor every millisecond of this, but my body was having none of that. The forces driving within us, between us and around us were so powerful, the moment I sank into her creamy clench, raw, primal instinct took over.
Her legs curled around my hips, her nails scored my back, and I drummed into her, every stroke deeper than the last. I felt the shudder roll through her body, her channel pulsing around my cock. She cried out, my name a rough shout, just as my own release thundered through me. I fell against her, annihilated inside and out by the release and what it felt like to be with her. As my breath slowly eased and my heart stopped pounding so hard I could barely hear, I shifted my weight to her side.
We lay in a sweaty tangle. After a moment, I felt her eyes on me and opened mine. Her eyes were clear. After a beat, she reached up and smoothed my brows with her fingertip.
Chapter 21
Amelia
I leaned my elbows on the counter and watched as Cade practically inhaled the omelet I’d served him a few minutes ago. I’d managed to get through most of the morning without letting my pushy, critical mind get in the way of the best morning I’d had in as long as I could remember. Last night had been amazing. This morning had been amazing. It felt so strange and familiar at once to be with Cade like this again. It was hard to believe the ugly part of last night had even happened. I still didn’t know quite what to think of how easily I’d let go of Earl. In hindsight, it was brutally clear I’d never loved him. My mind and heart were filled with Cade and Cade alone.
I wasn’t in the mood to avoid anything anymore. I’d wasted two years of my life on Earl and far more all because I’d been so good at avoiding anything that made me think about Cade. Funny thing was, despite my stubborn, herculean efforts, Cade had never been far from my mind. All I’d succeeded at was blocking myself from the truth. What a waste.
The coffee maker beeped and I turned to check it. After filling two mugs, I slid one across the counter and sat down across from him. “So, when did you say you start work?”
“Monday,” he said between bites.
“What are you doing today?”
He took a slow sip of coffee, his green gaze assessing. “Whatever you’re doing,” he said, a slow grin curling the corners of his mouth.
I smiled straight through to my toes, emotion rocking me as tears pricked at my eyes.
His smile faded, and he set his coffee down, reaching over to curl his hand around mine. “Hey, if it’s too much, just say so. There’s what I want now and what I want long-term. I don’t want to take it slow, but I know maybe the timing’s not the best.” He paused, his throat working and his eyes locking to mine—his intent gaze making me feel as if he could see right into my heart. “I don’t want to fuck this up again.”
I swallowed against the emotion clogging my throat and shook my head. “It’s not that. It’s just everything feels so good and I’m so glad you’re here and I just don’t want to mess up. As far as I’m concerned, you should just stay right here and never leave.”
He chuckled, the low rumble curling around my heart. “Well, that’s easy. As it is, I’m shacking up with my parents until I find somewhere else. Trust me, my mom’ll do a dance if I tell her I’m staying with you.”
“She probably would.” I paused to sip my coffee. “I think I should feel bad about Earl, but I don’t. I walked out on us before I even knew you were coming home. And all the reasons I did were because it had never been right.”
I chewed on the inside of my cheek and looked over at Cade. He took another bite of his omelet. After he finished chewing, he eyed me and shrugged. “Honestly, I’m not thinking so much about Earl, but us. If taking things slow means we don’t screw this six ways to Sunday again, I’ll do it.”
I took another sip of coffee, savoring the bitter flavor and pondering how to say what I knew needed to be said. “We might have done things differently, but Shannon’s the one who lied.”
Darkness flashed in Cade’s eyes. “It’s fair to say we’re both pretty stubborn,” he finally said.
I squeezed his hand. “Maybe. Tell me, are you still mad at me?”
He arched a brow in question.
“For getting so angry I never gave you a chance to explain,” I added.
He squeezed my hand in return and took a swallow of coffee, his eyes considering. “I was, but I’m not now. Look, I don’t blame you for a second for getting pissed that morning. Hell, I couldn’t even deal with you sitting at a table with Earl even when I knew why you were there.” He paused and set his coffee down, reaching for my other hand and holding both in his. “We can’t change the past. I came home prepared to get used to living without you when I knew you were nearby. It was fucking hell when I was over three thousand miles away, but I didn’t have to see you. Then, well, everything changed and now we’re here. Let’s just take it one day at a time. If there’s one thing you don’t need to worry about it’s me going anywhere and wanting anyone else. Hell, I missed you so damn much, I didn’t even bother trying to find someone else.”
“You didn’t see anyone? At all?” I asked. I couldn’t help the tiny swirls of doubts in my mind. The old seeds of insecurity planted by Shannon’s manipulation and the reality most guys just didn’t know how to deal with me were hard to move beyond. It wasn’t like I went around thinking I was an ugly duckling. No, rather I knew quite well most men preferred women who didn’t stand eye to eye with them. It was what it was. I’d never bothered with the bigger implications of that and what it said about the world we lived in. I stared over at him.
He gave my hands a squeeze before freeing one to snag his coffee cup and take a long swallow. “I wasn’t celibate if that’s what you’re asking, but I haven’t slept beside anyone since you.”
His eyes held mine, and my heart set to hammering so hard and fast I could barely breathe as the enormity of what he meant sank in. I’d thought I was alone in my complete acceptance that no one else would ever measure up to what I had with Cade.
Chapter 22
Cade
I walked into the fire station and leaned my elbows on the reception desk. Maisie was on the phone, her eyes flicking to me as if puzzled at my presence. It was midway through my second week on duty, and I’d determined I was going to kill her with kindness. It just goes to show how prickly she was that me, a man who’d worn my bitterness toward women like a badge for years, was trying to cajole her into being nicer.
But damn. She was like a cactus, and Carol had been more like a mother hen to all of us. It was difficult to believe Maisie was actually related to her. They shared the same wide brown eyes, and though my memories of Carol when she was younger were through the hazy lens of a little boy, I recalled her being pretty. Maisie could be if she stopped glaring at everyone.
I’d mentioned to Amelia that I missed Carol and couldn’t quite believe Carol had persuaded my father to agree to hire Maisie for dispatch. She’d looked over at me and sighed, reminding me Maisie had spent her childhood dragged all over the place with pretty much nowhere to call home. According to Amelia, Maisie had come to visit Carol
when she was in hospice, and Carol had asked my father to give her a chance with a job. She’d then pointedly ordered me to be nice.
I figured if Maisie couldn’t pamper me and the guys, we’d kill her with kindness. In my short time here, I watched her ignore all the guys, studiously avoid anything resembling a friendly conversation and wear the chip on her shoulder as if it were a cinder block. She’d been so prickly, the rest of the guys avoided her at all costs with the exception of Beck who occasionally, very occasionally, eyed her and made some attempt at small talk. Beck’s exterior was like a non-stick pan—everything slid right off of him, so Maisie’s unfriendliness didn’t bother him much.
All in all, I was feeling magnanimous. The last two weeks had been about the best of my life. Being with Amelia was just short of heaven. Oh, we had some stuff to get through, and she was as stubborn as I remembered, but then so was I. The best thing about arguments was we knew how to have fucking awesome makeup sex. My libido, long sidelined to casual encounters, was getting a hell of a workout these days. Only an hour ago, Amelia’s mouth had been wrapped around my cock in the shower. That was after I’d been buried to the hilt inside of her right after we woke up.
There was my overall good mood and the fact I preferred to have my crew like and trust our main dispatcher. I didn’t worry Maisie wouldn’t be on the dot when it came to her job. She took it very seriously. Her attitude, however, left more than a little to be desired.
I leaned on my elbows and smiled at her when she finally tapped to end whatever call she was on. She adjusted her headset and glared up at me. “Can I help you?” she said stiffly.
She had no idea how lucky she was I wasn’t feeling as cranky as I had been for seven years straight. Otherwise, I’d have snapped right back at her. Instead, I reminded myself to be patient. If I didn’t want her to act like this, I needed to not be an asshole.