Crazy For You (Last Frontier Lodge Novels Book 8) Page 19

  “Thought you were asleep,” he said, his voice gravelly.

  “I forgot to say good night.”

  She burrowed closer and dropped kisses on his neck. “Good night,” she murmured against his skin.

  Damn. Just when he thought he had some semblance of control, she went and showed him just how powerless he was when it came to her. “Vi, if you…”

  Her head whipped up, her eyes gleaming in the dim light. “You’re too tired.”

  Even though his body had other ideas, he could barely keep his eyes open. He slipped his hand into her hair. “I’m never too tired,” he said as he drew her closer for a kiss.

  ***

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  Please enjoy the following excerpt from Once Burned (Into the Fire Series).

  Excerpt: Once Burned by J.H. Croix; all rights reserved

  Amelia Haynes drained her beer and glanced around the bar, savoring the anonymity of being in a crowded bar in Anchorage, Alaska where no one knew her. She was tucked in the corner by the wall, pleased to have a nice view of the crowd and yet go unnoticed by just about everyone there. The bartender caught her eyes, a question held in them. She nodded and held her empty beer bottle aloft. He nodded in return while he mixed a drink for someone and snagged an icy cold beer for her with his free hand. The extent of her conversation with anyone this evening had been limited to the bartender’s introduction. He’d introduced himself as Tank and taken one look in her eyes and announced, “You need a drink.”

  “A beer will do,” were the last four words she’d spoken.

  Tank, a jolly looking man with round blue eyes and a wide smile, had promptly handed her a beer and left her be. If he thought anything awry with the fact she was wearing a wedding dress splashed with mud, he didn’t show it. Neither did anyone around her. Anchorage was just large enough of a city that people left you alone if you appeared to want to be left as such. That said, people were friendly too. Alaska, despite its sprawling geography, kept its residents close, all bound by the knowledge they lived on the edge of the wild and had the strength and guts for such a life.

  Amelia took a drag on what was her third beer and wondered if perhaps she should slow down. She was definitely tipsy and on her way to drunk. She fingered the cream silk of her wedding dress. Or maybe she needed to consider it her not-wedding dress. She’d been all dressed and ready to go when she’d failed in her battle against the knot of tension balled like a vice around her heart. She swallowed against the rush of emotion that rose inside as her eyes traveled down the fitted bodice of her dress and bounced to the muddy splotches all over the swirling skirt. Oh yeah. She hadn’t simply ditched her groom-to-be at the altar, she’d bolted in the rain. Another swallow of beer and a gulp of air that she let out slowly. What made her the saddest of all was the most powerful feeling she felt was relief. Not regret, not second thoughts. Just pure relief.

  She’d walked across the hallway at the back of the church and barged into Earl’s dressing room. There he’d stood, tall and handsome with his dark blonde hair and brown eyes. It was what she never saw in his eyes when he looked at her that pushed her to tell him she couldn’t marry him. When Earl looked at her, she saw a kind regard, a humored attempt to appreciate her for who she was. Yet, there was never anything close to the hot fire she’d known once upon a time. What she’d known for months, really the entire time she’d dated Earl, had finally pushed her to speak the truth. She’d apologized, but she’d also been furious with him for trying to trick himself and her into thinking he really loved her. She knew what white-hot passion felt like and she knew damn well Earl didn’t feel anything close to that with her.

  A dash into the late afternoon rain on a cool summer day in Alaska had felt cleansing. Until she got chilled and finally ducked into this bar. She didn’t even know what it was called. It suddenly occurred to her she didn’t have any money on her. Oh well, oh hell. She caught sight of her reflection in the mirror behind the bar. She looked away quickly. She’d never been too enamored with her looks. Amber hair and eyes to match were fine, but she knew what most people saw. A woman who was perhaps on the pretty side, but as tall as most men, strong and sturdy. She ran her own construction business to boot. She tried to never let it show because she was confident in every other area of her life, but when it came to her femininity, seeds of doubt were planted firmly inside. It didn’t help that all but one man treated her pretty much like a man, Earl included.

  A hard shake of her head and she glanced around the bar again, her eyes scanning the collection of people. Businessmen rubbed elbows with fishermen here. Sports reigned supreme on the televisions screens mounted at various points in the bar, and a few pool tables clustered in the corner. That’s what she’d do. She loved pool and was pretty darn good at it.

  A few minutes later, she was paired up in a game with three other guys. They’d thrown a few looks askance at her wedding dress and seemed entertained with the idea of her playing. Tipsy and deep into her don’t give a damn mode, Amelia set out to beat them.

  Roughly an hour later, she grinned as her last ball rolled neatly into a pocket corner. “Well, boys,” she said as she glanced among them.

  The boys in question had been drinking and gotten steadily more sullen as she played. One of them, a hulking sort with dark eyes and hair, glared at her. They’d bet on this game, and she was due five dollars each from them.

  Mr. Hulk, as she’d come to call him in her head, stepped close to her, too close for comfort. “No fiver from any of us. You got that?”

  Amelia was just drunk enough not to care. She stretched up to her full five foot eleven inches. He might have more bulk than her, but she was a hair taller. “Ah, I see. You only like to bet if you’re gonna win? What an ass,” she said with a sneer.

  She was stretched too thin emotionally with white hot anger, a simmering anger she’d kept buried for the entirety of the two years she’d wasted on Earl, and a tad too drunk to be reasonable right now. When the jerk stepped closer and put his finger on her chest, she punched him.

  “You fuckin’ bitch!” he shouted as he swiped his sleeve across his face, smearing the blood from his nose on his cheek.

  Then, he punched her back. She tumbled to the floor, an inglorious heap of muddied silk spilling around her. Without the mud, minus the dingy hardwood floor under her and definitely minus the crowd that had now gathered around, she dispassionately considered that the way the silk of her dress spilled in a near perfect circle would have made a great wedding photo—one of those candid shots that people would love.

  In a flash, Tank was there, shoving the guy who’d punched her away. Voices collided with each other.

  “Dude, she hit me first!”

  “Self defense…”

  “Yeah, but she’s a girl…”

  “She’s a fuckin’ giant, and she can hit. She’s no girl!”

  Amelia closed her eyes and wished she could crawl into a hole. The jerk was about right. She was a giant and no one would ever look at her and think girly thoughts.

  “Amelia?”

  Her heartbeat came to a screeching stop and then jumpstarted with a hard kick. She’d know that voice anywhere. Through the jumble around her with Tank leaning over to ask if she was okay, that voice rang like a loud bell in her heart and mind. One man. Only one man had ever looked at her with heat in his eyes, heat so hot it singed her. That man spoke her name now. She didn’t have to open her eyes to know. She did anyway. Because she couldn’t bear not to see him.

  Cade Masters stood at the edge of the circle gathered around her, another man in a bar crowded with men. Shaggy dark brown hair, green eyes, and a body of raw muscle stood before her. Her heart felt as if had been split open. She’d loved Cade in that wild headlong way that only youth allowed. No more than seven years had p
assed since she’d seen him, but it felt like forever. Cade had broken her heart and walked out of her life when she was twenty-two. He hadn’t just broken her heart, he’d betrayed her.

  Anger flashed hot and high inside, yet she couldn’t look away. Her eyes ate Cade up. He wore faded jeans, the fabric so worn it hugged his muscled legs like a caress, and a denim jacket over a black t-shirt. He had something of an outdoorsy, biker vibe. Once upon a time, he’d taken her on long rides on his motorcycle through the nearly empty highways in Alaska surrounding their hometown. Cade stepped through the crowd and knelt at her side, his green gaze coasting over her. “You okay?” he asked.

  She nodded without really thinking about it. He lifted a hand and ran the backs of his fingers along her cheekbone. Oh right, some guy had just punched her in the face. Cade’s presence had wiped her mind clean of everything else. With barely a brush of his touch, her heart fluttered and heat tightened inside.

  “You sure?”

  She swallowed, suddenly aware of her throbbing cheek. Her entire day flashed through her mind. A gloriously shitty day. She fought against the tears, but they welled up, unbidden and beyond her control. One tear rolled down her cheek and then another and another. Of all the times and places to encounter the one and only man who still held a piece of her heart, this had to be the absolute worst.

  Cade’s eyes never left hers. Something flickered deep in the depths of them, but she didn’t know how to interpret it. Without a word, he slipped his arm around her waist and lifted her up, bundling her into his arms as if it was the most normal thing in the world to do. “Let’s get you out of here,” he said and started to stride away.

  Tank caught him by the arm, and Cade glanced to him. “Yeah?”

  “Just making sure she’s okay,” Tank replied.

  All Amelia could do was nod. She was so totally not okay, but she was okay in the sense Tank was asking.

  Tank’s warm gaze held hers, this bartender who barely knew her, but had somehow known she’d had a bad day and just needed to be left in peace while she had a few beers. She should’ve stayed at the bar. Her raw emotions and crazy day, all of her own making if she was being honest with herself, had gotten her into this mess. “You want the police involved?” Tank asked.

  She shook her head and finally found her voice. “No. Let’s call it even. I punched him, he punched me.”

  “You know this guy?” Tank asked next, nodding to Cade.

  “Uh huh. It’s okay. He’s an old friend of my family’s. No need to worry,” she managed. On its face, her explanation was true. She and Cade had grown up together in Willow Brook, Alaska. Their families had known each other for years. Yet, her explanation left out how much Cade had meant to her once upon a time.

  Tank released his grip on Cade’s arm and let them be. Cade was quiet as he strode through the bar, the crowd parting around him. She could only imagine how they looked—her in her dirty not-wedding dress and him giving off his usual leave me the hell alone vibes. It was a shock to see him for the first time in years and even more of a shock to be held in his arms. She felt at home in his strong embrace. He held her easily. He always had. She loved that about him. Cade was a good four inches taller than her at six foot three inches and had never cared about how big she was. He pushed through the door of the bar, stepping out into the late evening. The rain had stopped at some point during the long hours she’d been hiding in the bar.

  He paused once they were outside on the sidewalk and glanced down, his gaze catching hers. “Why are you wearing a wedding dress?” he asked.

  That was Cade. He never was one to waste time on preliminaries. She’d loved that about him. Oh how she’d loved so many things about Cade, back before he’d left her heart bruised and battered. Right now, she couldn’t seem to recall the pain. All she knew was it felt so good, so, so, so good to be with him.

  “I was supposed to get married today. I didn’t,” Amelia said.

  Cade stared down at her and tried to collect his thoughts into something sensible. But there was nothing sensible about him when it came to Amelia Haynes. Right now, in fact, he was wondering if maybe he should carry her down the street to the courthouse and marry her. He wanted to. Damn did he want to.

  The only thing holding him back was the memory of the look on her face the last time he’d seen her. She’d walked in on her former best friend trying to kiss him in his bed. It didn’t matter that he’d been turning away and had been plain horrified to wake up and find Shannon climbing into his bed naked. No, what mattered was Amelia saw Shannon mashing her mouth against his and then acting like it had happened before. Amelia’s face had gone white and then dark with fury. He never got another chance to talk to her. Nothing ever happened with Shannon, but Amelia iced him out of her life. The whole situation was made worse by the fact he’d been about to leave Willow Brook, Alaska for a year the next day. No time to make things right. He’d come within a hairsbreadth of changing his plans, but Shannon had thought ahead and somehow convinced him Amelia had been making a play for one of his friends behind his back.

  The emotional upheaval hadn’t helped him think clearly. He’d left Willow Brook for his planned year with a hot shot firefighting crew in California. He’d returned to Willow Brook a few times to visit his family, but he’d never seen Amelia. Then he’d heard she was engaged to Earl Osborne. It had taken him only one run in with his old buddy, John Stacks, to find out Shannon had lied about that too. There had been no ‘there’ to the bullshit Shannon spewed about Amelia. John had stared at Cade like he was crazy and told him to get a grip when Cade asked if he and Amelia had ever had a thing. Even though Cade had wanted to track Amelia down and make sure she knew the truth of what happened, he’d bitterly accepted that it was probably best to let it go. With the knowledge she was getting married, he’d figured there was no sense in stirring up the past.

  Cade was in Anchorage now because he was taking care of a few errands before driving to Willow Brook tomorrow. He’d accepted a job as a foreman on a hot shot crew based out of Willow Brook. He’d hoped he was over Amelia, but one look at her and he might as well hand over his heart on a platter.

  He stared down into her eyes and tried to think. Her eyes were like honeyed cognac. Her hair, amber flecked with gold, fell in tousled waves around her shoulders. It was a mess really. All of her was. Her wedding dress was dirty, a bruise was forming on her cheek just under her eye, and he was pretty sure she was drunk.

  She stared back at him, and he realized he hadn’t said a thing since she made her announcement. “You were supposed to get married today?”

  “Yup.” She nodded forcefully. “Sure was. I walked out. Couldn’t do it. You know why?” she asked, a mulish tone to her question.

  “Why?”

  She poked him in the chest with her index finger. “It’s all your fault.”

  He was lost, he truly was. How could it be his fault she didn’t get married?

  “Amelia, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he finally said.

  She rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. “No one looks at me the way you did. That’s the whole problem. Why’d you have go and be such an asshole?”

  While he was reverberating at what she said, she kept on talking, the words spilling out every which way, here and there a word slurring. “Earl tried, oh he tried, to act like it mattered. But he was like every other guy I dated. Not that there were that many. I’m too big. I’m not feminine enough. But it’s like he thought he could prove he was a man by dating me. Stupid, stupid, stupid.” She punctuated these words with a thump of her forehead against Cade’s chest, all the while he stood frozen on the sidewalk. Traffic rolled by and pedestrians stepped around them.

  Her eyes whipped up again, lasering him with an accusing glare. “You weren’t like that. But after it all, you were.”

  Anger rose inside. She’d boxed him out of her life so effectively, he’d never had a chance to even tell her what didn’t happen with Shannon
, never had a chance to explain how Shannon had tripped him up with her lies about Amelia and John. Cade looked down at Amelia and started walking quickly, driven by the lingering anger at what tore them apart and the fresh anger at what she said about herself. She kicked her legs against his.

  “What are you doing?”

  He couldn’t answer because he didn’t know. It so happened his truck was parked just ahead. He kept walking and stopped beside it, easing her down. The moment her feet landed on the sidewalk, she tried to push away, only to stumble. He reached for her reflexively, catching her fast against him. A bolt of need hit him. Amelia was tall and strong with generous curves. Just as before, his body knew what it liked. He’d always loved how she stood nearly level with him. His eyes canted down of their own accord to see the soft curves of her breasts mounding up over the fitted top of her wedding dress. He forced his gaze up to find hers wide and locked to him.

  An old, familiar electricity arced to life around them. This was Amelia. This was them. Nothing had faded between them, if anything it burned hotter than it ever had. In a distant corner of his mind, he tried to tell himself not to do this. If he wanted to make things right, he had to go slow. Yet, with her held against him and her amber eyes flashing fire, he did the only thing he wanted. He backed her against his truck. “You’re not too big. Don’t ever say that again,” he growled before crushing his lips to hers.

  It was as if no time had passed, well except for the fact he was pouring seven years of longing into their kiss. She arched into him and threaded a hand roughly into his hair, moaning in his mouth with every stroke of her tongue against his. He couldn’t stop kissing her. She felt so good, so damn good. His mind fuzzed out and all he knew was the feel of her against him. A horn honked nearby, and Amelia tore her lips free.